Cardinal Vanities

Pat Gibson
3 min readApr 24, 2021
Male Cardinal

Seems a little contradictory that the female of the human species is usually the dressier one when in most of the animal kingdom the male gets that distinction. Now among animals, the reason is pretty clear. The female needs to be inconspicuous so she can protect and hide her babies. All the showier dressing among humans can’t be explained quite as easily. It is my opinion that because women were considered property of their husband for so many years, they got used to being decorated to show off how rich hubby was.

One of the flashiest male critters around here is the cardinal. (Peacocks don’t count `cause they’re not native.) The perky red birds live here all year round and really stand out against the cedar trees. A friend of mine has one that must be the vainest bird alive.

On the back side of her house there is a sliding glass door that opens onto the patio. A small oak tree grows on the patio edge and hangs over the door. Shortly after they moved in, they discovered a male cardinal had taken residence on a branch of that tree where he could see himself in the door. At first, they thought he was sitting there thinking his reflection was another male trying to invade his territory. He did fly at the glass once or twice but most of the time he just sat there, looking at his reflection. How do they know he’s looking at his reflection? He only sits on the branch when the light is right to see himself.

Now the odd behavior of this bird would just be a funny to tell the neighbors and show the grandkids if the darn bird didn’t get so upset when you open the door or change the lighting. He flies at you! He scolds and fusses. And when he isn’t protesting, he messes on the patio. Now my friend and her husband tried several things to get that bird to leave. The threw things at him. They hung up wind chimes. They tried keeping the curtains closed. He persisted. Finally, while unpacking, my friend found a large owl candle. They rigged a shelf on the top of the door and there they placed the candle. It worked! The cardinal thought it was his enemy, the predator owl. Last I heard, the bird had decided that the oak by the patio was too dangerous a place to roost.

Now I’ve never had a problem with cardinals here on Sulfur Creek, but we were entertained by a family of them one year. The crew were feeding birds under the oaks out back that spring. A pair of cardinals would come and feed along with several other birds. As summer approached, the cardinals began to bring their young to the feeding area. One little male was especially fun to watch. He would sit on the tree watching while his siblings and parents fed. Occasionally the mother or father bird would fly up and seem to encourage him to come down. Finally, he would venture on to the dangerous ground, but he never was too sure. The entire time he was feeding, his wings would be partially extended, fluttering. We named him Flutter and I had to keep the crew from scaring him deliberately. Just based on looks, a full grown cardinal male may have reason to be a little proud but not as vain as my friend’s bird.

There is a bird here on Sulfur Creek that has every reason to be very vain, but that’s another story.

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Pat Gibson

A fan of Liad, Valdemar, Pern, and Narnia, I am a writer, an educator, and a thinker.